What would inspire a man to give up his job? Lie to his
friends? Avoid his parents? Con his girlfriend? And shell out tens
of thousands of his own cash? Only to spend months in a darkened
room in South London, looking for the money shot and hanging out
with people named after puns? ''Anonymous'' never thought he would
become a porn director. His dad''s a vicar and his mother bakes
cakes for the WI. But when his career as a session musician stalls,
he decides it''s time for plan B. So begins his first year as a
rookie director. Trying to film a secret orgy in a five-star hotel
can be tricky, especially when a plane load of flight attendants
try and join in. Then there''s your temperamental cameraman and the
porn star who can''t get it up. And when exactly is the right time
to tell your gorgeous but sensitive girlfriend what you really do
for a living? Full of hilarious and downright eye-popping stories,
TOUCH WOOD is the first book to expose the secret world of the UK
porn industry. Shocking and deliciously naughty, it is very, very
funny and sure to keep you up all night ...